WF Update (1/16/12)
We spent the afternoon in a tent. The other attendees were Rick Perry, Mitt
Romney, Ron Paul, Rick Santorum, and Newt Gingrich. I am not kidding. It was
quite an afternoon.
First I will give you the “big picture” background. The South Carolina GOP
primary is next week. The candidates have been swarming the state. There is a
big, televised debate tonight. It is right next door in Myrtle Beach. The
pre-debate events have been occurring in Myrtle Beach for a few days. We thought
it would be fun to personally see the candidates, but we weren’t going to spend
the big dollars that were required to gain entry to one of the official events.
(What a racket for the local GOP!) All of the unofficial events (i.e. free) were
at weird little towns that we didn’t want to visit. Thus, it didn’t look like we
were going to see the big contenders.
On a lark, this morning we took the short drive to the convention center to view
the media circus. Because we had not paid for credentials, we couldn’t see much.
When we were walking near a distant parking lot (which happened to be near a
giant sand sculpture of the candidates), we saw a smallish white tent with a
sign that said all the candidates would be there at 3:00 p.m. today. I didn’t
believe it. I asked the guy guarding the tent. He said there was a FREE event at
3:00 p.m. and that all the candidates were confirmed. I still didn’t believe
him.
We did other things around town and went back to the tent later. There was a
short line. We waited in line. At 2:30 we were walked inside, and put in the 5th
row, for the 3:00 event.
Now I will give you the “small picture” background so you can get a mental
picture. The tent was the size of a professional basketball court. There was an
aisle down the middle that would go from basket to basket. The left side of the
aisle was enclosed by barricades and was standing room for the press. The right
side of the aisle was filled with rows of chairs with 10 chairs in a row. The
podium was up front, 5 rows ahead of us.
The event was hosted by a powerful religious group called the Faith and Freedom
Coalition. All you need to know about its power is that it is powerful enough to
get all of the candidates to appear. The event was from 3:00 until 5:00. I am
sure the candidates would have preferred to be preparing for the debate (which
starts at 9), but they had to show up for this religious group. I am not sure
why they let us in, but it was fun to be there.
The whole thing had the feel of a revival meeting. A big white tent. A big crowd
exclusively composed of right-wing religious zealots. In between the short
speeches by the candidates, there was preaching by the political and religious
leaders of this crowd. Amens and alleluias abounded. Quite the scene.
A rigid format was followed. There was some initial preaching. Then a candidate
would take the stage, give a 10-12 minute talk, and exit the tent. There was
more preaching until the next guy arrived and did the same. We started with
Perry a bit after 3:00 and finished with Newt at about 5:15. We got a close-up
look at everybody.
Here is my short description of each guy:
Perry = A Texas Dunce
Romney = Boring Banker
Santorum = Friendly Neighbor
Paul = Guy Who Needs A Nap
Gingrich: Arrogant Civics Teacher
I will now give a few more comments about each guy.
Perry has huge hands. They are easily twice the size of normal hands. He has
clearly been to many of these revival meetings. He waves his massive hands to
emphasize his points. He really speaks from the heart, but brain power seems to
be lacking. He says he will push for making Congress a part-time legislature
staffed with part-time representatives. He figures that will reduce the amount
of trouble that Congress can cause. His best line was : ” If you really want to
know how a man will act in the future, look at his past.” Perry is very proud of
his Texas accomplishments. Haven’t we had enough from dumb Texans?
Boring. Boring. Boring. That’s Romney. He seems to be bored with himself. Mrs.
Romney actually stood behind him and yawned a few times. The guy has no passion.
He seems like a rich guy who is doing this because he has nothing else to do.
You get the feeling that he would like to add another accomplishment to his
resume, but that he doesn’t really care if he loses. His best line : ” We know
that President Obama was a community organizer, but I am not sure that he
intended to organize this community into defeating him.”
Santorum is the friendly guy from down the street. We all know, and like, guys
like this. Very basic. Homespun. Authentic. Bright. Serious. Best line: ” We
haven’t let President Obama spread the wealth around, so he is trying to spread
poverty around.”
Ron Paul is all doom and gloom. Maybe it was an appeal to this audience, but I
think he sees himself as a prophet. He preaches that the government is ruining
our economy and our standing in the world. He is here to save us and/or help us
save ourselves. He talks a bold game, but his body fails him. He is too small
and too frail. He doesn’t generate any electricity. He seems like an old,
broken-down, economics professor. I feel sorry for him.
Newt is an interesting character. His good side gives you the feel of a super
high school civics teacher. His bad side gives you the feel that he is probably
having an affair with a girl in the class. He is 100% politician. He launched
the biggest attacks of the afternoon, both against Romney and Obama. He says
Romney can’t win, and that it is time to unify around him as the other option.
I would say that Santorum got the biggest applause of the day. Close second
would go to Paul and Newt. Romney next. Perry at the bottom.
If I had to pick someone to trust from this group, it would be Santorum. He
seems trustworthy. Perry, Romney, and Gingrich seem like politicians who would
sell anybody out to advance their position. Paul is sincere, but he is too wacky
to be trusted.
Here are some things that I probably shouldn’t say, but I will say anyway:
• Perry should consider acting. He has a powerful presentation. Think Arnold
Schwarzenegger with a drawl.
• Mrs. Romney needs pep pills.
• Does anyone else think Adam Sandler when they see Santorum?
• Santorum should leave the kids at home. Not a pretty bunch.
• Why is Ron Paul married to somebody’s great, great, great grandmother? (She
has obviously received good health care to make it to 130.)
• Newt’s wife is strange. Really strange. If Romney is physically harmed, the
first person they should investigate is Mrs. Gingrich. From 60 feet away, that
lady gives me a bad vibe.
I miss Michelle Bachman and Herman Cain. Don’t you? They were the life of the party.
By the way, what ever happened to Herman’s accusers? They promised a big press conference where the whole story would be told.
Never Happened.
What a hatchet job on poor Herman
Donald Trump would of been a hoot at an event like this.I hate the guy, but he would have been a hoot anyway.
So, it was a fun day here in South Carolina. More soon.
KF - This is a pretty good recap, but I have to say it was all a little scary - and no comment on the Cain matter…